Friday, October 5, 2012

To the Boys

1. Don't lie to a girl or anyone else.

  • Don't say "I love you" unless you really do. I know lies sometimes get us further in life and boost brownie-points in some relationships, but men need to understand how girls were made and how we think. Love and compassion is how we communicate. It's a language we understand and long for. We're nurturers and nothing makes me more angry than a man who uses this to his advantage. Gentlemen, this is NOT a sign of weakness. It is the balance of life. Women are this way because the world needs nurturers. And when a man is honest, he will reap the benefits of a loving woman.
  • We all may notice that women are becoming more numb, lying just as much, and playing the game probably better than men. The phrase "love is a battlefield" has become the literal epidemic. It has become a defense mechanism. Women are defending themselves and are heart broken across the charts. To all the real men, step up and treat women right!

2. It's okay to just be friends. 

  • Being a tomboy as a child, I preferred to play dodgeball & kickball rather than imaginary tea party time in the tree house during recess. I would race boys, play tag, make mud pies, get cut up, and thoroughly enjoy the outdoors. It never crossed my mind that the boys who I would push in dirt would like me. It scared me and overall ruined most friendships. Girls LOVE guy friends. Guys are cool, laid back, funny, and know how to have a good time. They have a protective nature about them that girls love. Being in the "friend zone" is NOT a bad thing. It's actually a great thing because you may get the best out of that girl. She can be herself (which is a breath of fresh air for us). Imagine constantly having to have your guard up from not knowing someone's intentions. If a girl likes you, she'll show you.
  • When guys disappear after a boyfriend comes in the picture, it makes girls question if they were even their friends. It's more hurtful than you think. It may not even be that you were interested in her & are just showing respect to the bf, but show some respect to her- like a real friend would.

3. Good guys do not finish last.

  • It may seem that way, because some girls tend to go for the bad boys (it's phase most of the time). But if you think about it, if you're a good guy, what business do you have wanting a girl like that anyways? The two of you probably don't have much in common and you're beating yourself up about a girl who prefers to be in shady relationships? I'm telling you, there are just as many good girls who feel like all the good guys are taken! It's kind of funny. And on top of the bad boys getting a lot of girls, they may seem to be having the time of their lives, but they're lonely, get broken-hearted more frequently, and eventually end up settling down and getting married way later in life. 
  • And to the phrase "Good guys are always single" - It's better to be single than to be with the wrong person.

4. Chivalry is not dead, just dead in certain people.
  • I don't understand how being a gentleman is compared to being a push-over or worse. It takes real guts to respect women and put them first. Of course women can open their own doors, pay for their own meals, and push in their own seats- but there is something about a man who takes pride and pleasure in being a gentleman (and not just to his own mother). No matter how hard a woman works to become independent or how much she makes, or even how artistically she holds a scowl on her face, we love to be treated like ladies.

5. Treat a girl like a piece of meat, don't be surprised when she treats you like a piece of trash.
  • Sir: whistling, eyeballing, body shape staring and complimenting, mumbling in girls' ears as they walk by, licking of the lips, walking in a weird wanna-be-cool way, talking low, clearing your voice for attention,  running into girls on purpose, and the list goes on... is ridiculous. Seriously, just stop it. Control yourselves, show some respect, & you might get our attention.
  • PS: and to the girls who respond to these acts of taunting and mockery, please stop encouraging animal planet, in-the-wild mating behavior.

6. Playing hard to get is a girl's job and right.
  • Cocky guys, conceited guys, confident guys, handsome guys, tall guys, muscular guys, popular guys, talented guys. Calm down. There is nothing more attractive than a well-rounded humble guy. the female, in ANY species, has the right to choose and play hard to get. Ultimately, it's supposed to be the female's choice (that's why men propose and women have the final say). How come animals understand this concept and not humans? hmm...

7. Practice self-control
  • I know it's hard, but it helps to focus on other things in life and appreciate women more. The world is over-sexualized and encourages fleshly behavior, but fight against it and show yourself it's possible while impacting other men around you.
  • And men that can control themselves seem to be more intellectual, in my opinion.

8. Well dressed men & tailored suits always win.
  • There's nothing like a man who knows how to dress! (and you don't have to be European to dress well!) Get creative! 
  • Toss the flip flops, cargos, tank tops, and polos. PLEASE!

9. Take care of your body & brain.
  • I believe working out and good hygiene is a must for ALL men. I mean the male body is a work of art. Have you seen the potential & muscle-build that you can have? Of course, you have. It's just meant to be that way.
  • Girls love cologne and stuff that smell good :)
  • Read a book and talk about it- challenge yourself

10. Talking down to other guys does not make you more masculine or cool. It makes you look like a jerk.
  • Guys that aren't afraid of their emotions, who can compliment another guy or just be nice- are easier to be around. Whatever culture lied to men and encouraged handshakes instead of hugs, don't understand human interaction and companionship. Some guys just need a hug and a pat on the back that they're doing just fine. We're all human.

11. Putting God, the weak, the hopeless, young & elderly before yourself is what makes you a man.
  • It seems to be against a man's nature to submit or show signs of compassion, but in reality it is necessary. The natural protectiveness, strength, and way of logical thinking are the tools that men are equipped with to give hope and faith back to their communities. A great example would be Captain America (since men love action heroes) his heart was so big and he used it to save millions. The scene that makes me tear up every time is when Colonel Phillips throws a fake grenade into a soldier's training exercise and all of the soldiers run for cover and Steve Rodgers jumps on it, ultimately ready to sacrifice his life. That is heart that every man is capable of! 

:) Helen 

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